Why You Need to Stop Feeling Guilty About Being Ambitious

Let’s dispel the myth that women, especially young mothers, need to refrain from ambition or feel guilty if they are ambitious. If you ever feel you might be doing something wrong because you believe you have business or creative potential and want to do something about it, read on. Time to kick those limiting beliefs to the curb!

be ambitious

“Ambition” seems to be a loaded word for women. Does ambition collide with feminine virtues of motherhood? Let's take a look: The dictionary defines ambition as “a strong desire to do or to achieve something, typically requiring determination and hard work.” That sure sounds admirable to me!

There is room for “ambition” in every area of our lives. You can be ambitious about raising kind, contributing humans. There’s nothing that takes more effort over the course of decades than raising kids. You can be ambitious about improving your marriage, a serious effort for the committed of heart! You can be ambitious about improving your health, which requires you to make changes in your day-to-day nutrition and exercise habits. All of these meaningful efforts require determination and hard work.

At The Mama Ladder®, we empower women at the intersection of mamahood and entrepreneurship. Believe this: You are absolutely allowed to be ambitious about growing your company, creating more opportunities, and making more money. Be as ambitious as you want!

I’ve had to work through my own limiting beliefs about being ambitious in my career. For years, I hid my ambition from different people in my life, trying to gauge how they would react. I would be quiet about exciting achievements because I was afraid of others’ responses. Looking back I think, “What a waste of energy!”

I’ve learned I don’t need to to waste my precious time and mind power worrying about what other people think. Being out of the corporate ladder really helps because I’m not constantly surrounded by others’ limiting beliefs. I “create my own ladder” as a business owner and it’s incredibly liberating to set BIG, beautiful goals, and climb after them boldly without needing to hold back due to other people’s fragile egos.

If you find yourself thinking you need to rein in your ambition, here are some truths to keep in mind:

Progressing, growing, and learning are your innate right and potential.

This ability to move towards your goals has many names, like “the pursuit of happiness” in the U.S. Declaration of Independence. Nature shows us examples of this: Fruit trees are always seeking to grow and create as much fruit as they can. Do they hold back for fear the other fruit trees will feel inadequate? No! They are naturally created to seek sunshine, nutrients, and every possible resource to help them progress. The same goes for you. Progress, grow, and feel good about striving towards your potential!

The desires and wild dreams you hold in your heart are there for a reason.

Whatever your belief system (God, the Universe, Muse, etc.), know that the quiet whisperings of your heart are there to guide you towards what you can become and who you can help. If you have a deep desire to do something good or meaningful, listen to it. This could be finally writing that book you’ve always want to write, or collaborating with other brands for a big campaign, or launching new services that will make a real difference in people’s lives.

See your ambition as a clue to the good you (and only you) can do for the world.

Doing good is not limited to non-profit organizations or church groups. There are countless ways to be big-hearted as a for-profit business. It’s the reason we give $5,000 to a promising mom entrepreneur in our HIGH FIVE grant program twice a year. It’s our dream to truly empower mom entrepreneurs, and we’re happy to put money behind that dream!

When you allow yourself to dream and ACT big, you give others permission to do so as well.

This includes your child(ren). By showing your kids you believe you are worthy of greatness and your dreams deserve your attention, you teach them they can believe the same for themselves. What an incredible gift to give your children, friends, community, and anyone who your life touches!

If you feel ambitious about growing your business, congratulations. That’s a sign you deeply care, and have the ability to do and BE more than you currently are. Listen to that desire, and allow it to motivate you to take bold action. You’ll be happily surprised to see what you can create, thanks to your ambition and hard work to back it up.

Want help to climb after your ambitious business goals? Let’s do it, Mama! We specialize in working with women of action who are committed to their babies and their business. Join us and other like-minded mamapreneurs at #MamaSpringBreak.

5 tips for writing your first book

Do you dream of writing a book? Writing a book is a huge way to set yourself apart as an expert, to share your message on a broader scale, and attract clients to your business. The word “author” has the same root as “authority” for a reason.

I believe if you’re feeling prompted to write, sharing that book inside you is one of the reasons you’re on this planet.  

I’m in the final publishing stage of my first book, the most transformative professional project I've taken on yet. (We’re talking, my-life-will-never-be-the-same kind of stuff, and a catalyst for why I cofounded www.themamaladder.com.)

write your first book tips by Crystalee Beck at The Mama Ladder

Writing this book was more challenging and rewarding than my master’s thesis, which I wrote during maternity leave and I thought would kill me! So yeah, this 300-page baby means a whole lot to me.

FIRST, THE BACKGROUND STORY ON THIS BOOK

In summer 2016 I was commissioned to write a biography for Alan E. Hall. He’s well-known in northern Utah and beyond as serial entrepreneur, angel investor, and philanthropist. He has influenced thousands and thousands of people around the world as a caring employer, generous philanthropist, and inspiring leader.

We spent a year and a half meeting regularly for interviews for the book. There’s something sacred about hearing someone’s life stories like that. I got to know about the kid, teenager, young adult, and mature versions of Alan through his memories. And what I loved most of all was how he’s dedicated his life to GIVING BACK after finding his own business success.

5 TIPS TO HELP YOU WRITE A BOOK

His lessons have become intertwined into how I view the world, family, business, philanthropy, and most of all, myself. I’ll share some of those insights in another post, but for now, here are five tips to help YOU write your own book.

1.  BE PREPARED FOR SERIOUS MENTAL BLOCKS.

Any time you do anything important, you will have an internal struggle. It’s so much easier NOT to finish something hard. To tune out deadlines and binge on Netflix. To fill your life so full of commitments there is no room for creativity. For me, this internal struggle was painful. I fought with self-doubt, procrastination, and self-sabotage I couldn’t really understand.

 Thankfully, I read Stephen Pressfield’s landmark book, “The War of Art” during this project. I cannot recommend it more highly. Pressfield so eloquently identified my daily battles with inner Resistance—and then gave me tools to fight it. Some days Resistance won the battle. But I won the war.

2.  FOCUS. FOCUS. FOCUS.

The hardest part of writing a book was NOT the writing. It was forcing myself to focus. To carve out uninterrupted chunks of time where I could lose myself in the process. I deemed 2017 my year of “FOCUS” specifically because of this project.

I found a quiet, beautiful location in my local community without Internet where I couldn’t be distracted by email notifications, whining kids, or taunting piles of laundry. I’d go there, put in earplugs, and time myself for a three- or four-hour chunk of focused writing time.

3.  DOUBLE HOW LONG YOU THINK IT WILL TAKE.

Originally, I told Alan I thought I could write his book in nine months. That date came and went. Alan was patient with me, and happy with the chapters he’d seen so far, but I felt behind.

To give me some credit, I really didn’t know what I was in for. (And I made lots of mistakes. Once I accidently didn’t save a chapter, and 20 hours of work was gone!) It took 18 months before I sent Alan the final chapter to review. If possible, I highly recommend giving yourself ample time.

4.  SET MINI MILESTONES ALONG THE WAY.

During this process, the sheer personal effort reminded me of running a race. When I compete in triathlons or half marathons, I bring my whole self to races: physically, mentally, and emotionally. Writing a book was the same. For me, each of the 19 chapters was like passing a mile marker, one mile closer to the finish line. Without chunking it into mini milestones, I would have felt much more overwhelmed. Make sure to have little victories along the way.

5. BELIEVE YOU’RE WORTHY OF WRITING A BOOK—AND JUST START.

This is closely tied to mental blocks, but important enough to have its own bullet point. Sure, having a paying client forced me to face my own dreams (and demons). But now that I’ve written one book, I believe I’m worthy of it and hungry for more. It feels SO GOOD to get those words down.

I struggled with the thought, “Me? Are you sure you want me to write this?” but working through every page, paragraph, and sentence helped me see those insecurities for what they really are: excuses. The truth is, WHY NOT ME? And the same goes for you: WHY NOT YOU? Just start. Commit to finishing, and have someone important in your life hold you accountable.

Want to read Alan’s biography? For right now, it is not available for the public. It was written as a memoir for his family first, with the possibility of publishing in the future.

However, I’m currently working on my second book. It is written for YOU, the mom entrepreneur climbing after business dreams. This book “baby” is a labor of love and I can hardly wait to share it with you. (But first, let me double the time I think it will take me!) Sign up here for updates and to get a free chapter in the coming months.

Keep climbing,

Crystalee

Why Fear Can HELP You Progress in Business

Fear. It's a four-letter word. But then again, so is hope.

And FEAR doesn't need to stop you from starting or growing your business. No, Mama! 

In my recent interview with fabulous Monica Packer of the About Progress podcast, I shared my (ongoing) journey through fear as a mama business owner. 

She asked great questions and I was radically open and honest about what I've learned about fear, money, business, and motherhood ... addressing a lot of points from our 37-page, packed-full-of-goodness eBook, "The Mama's Guide: How to Embrace 7 Big Business Fears." (Which listeners get as a free gift!)

Listen in to hear:

  • Why fear is a GOOD thing -- and you need to listen to it
  • My biggest fear I am working through (even now!)
  • Why money is not good OR bad 
  • Practical tips on how you can embrace your fears and BE, DO, and CREATE more in your life

Listen here to the interview on the About Progress podcast >>

What fears are holding YOU back in business? Share below. There's power in telling your truth.